Friday, October 2, 2009

No Dads Allowed-Snoopy Style

I TA in a large lecture hall class (somewhere around 230 students). The class is a survey introduction to Children’s Literature. The majority of the students are going on to receive education degrees of one kind or another. My role within the class is complex, flexible and ever changing. It has been hectic, crazy, stressful, amazing, wonderful, exhilarating and ego boosting. The professor I work with refers to be very genuinely as his colleague, which makes a girl feel good! As such, I push myself to step up and do as much as I am able. After class on Thursday we had a line of students with questions. The professor, myself, and the other TA for the class each took questions and answered them as we were able. This system really worked and got through the massive line in no time at all. The final student question seemed to be giving the professor some trouble. He looked to his TAs for help. The student was having a “disconnect” with the material. She was sure she had failed the first two quizzes in our class. She hadn’t even bothered turning in the one we took earlier that morning. She assured us she was taking notes. She was tape recording the lectures. She was reviewing her notes when she got home. I ran through some suggestions and she seemed to feel better. I told her she could always talk to us outside of class if she continues to feel overwhelmed. She left with a smile on her face. I left feeling my work was done.

SCENE II: Jessica is eating a cup of yoghurt in her office and reading over lesson plans. She is feeling calm and at ease. She could take on the world!

Enter scene right: “disconnect” student and her father. (Let me repeat that: and HER FATHER!!)

Father: Excuse me! We need to talk.

Jessica: *choking on yoghurt Oh, hello. (Stands up) How can I help you?

Father: My daughter here is in that Children’s book class. You need to explain to me what the problem is.

Jessica: Hi, I’m Jessica Kander (Puts out hand to shake-REJECTED!) *trying to stall so my brain can catch up to the situation.

Father is angry. He speaks loudly. He accuses me, the professor, the school of not helping his daughter. What are we doing to help her? Why is she experiencing a disconnect? Why is this class so hard? What is the purpose of this class? What are the quizzes all about? The questions seem to go on forever. Once they are seated, I take a deep breath. I swallow hard and do the best thing I ever could have done:

I move my body so that I am facing only the student. I look only at the student. I direct my next comment to the student.

Jessica: It sounds like what you are saying is: you are having a hard time drawing information from the lecture and your notes to make a connection to the types of questions we ask on our quizzes.

Student: Uhm…

Father: She is taking notes. She is in class every day. What kinda question are you asking if she can’t answer them? *very accusatory

Jessica: *still facing student. So let’s look at the quiz from last week. (I pull up the quiz, the answers and the lecture notes and PowerPoint connected with this lecture)

I run through what the question is asking and we look back at the PowerPoint and notes. I show her that the answer is pulled directly from the PowerPoint. I remind her that the professor repeated this information three times and suggested that they make sure they get it since it “might end up on a quiz or exam”.

The Father is silent for a moment and then begins to badger me again as to why we have the quizzes and why we don’t provide complete notes online.

I breathe deeply, swallow and start. I simplify the reasons. I explain. I justify. I start over with the reasoning, the explaining and justifying for the lack of complete notes. And I do all this with my body language cutting Father out of the conversation.

He grumbles. I jump on this moment to really get the student talking. I ask her how she is taking notes. I have her show me the notes. I see a problem! We provide the PowerPoint before the lecture. Most students print this out and bring it to class (or do this right on their computer) and take their notes directly on the PowerPoint. She is printing out the PowerPoint. She is brining it to class. But she is writing her notes on a separate piece of lined paper. PROBLEM!! DISCONNECT!! She is writing some great details, but I can imagine that the disconnect is happening when she gets home and cannot remember where these details fit in. Which main point are they working towards? I strongly recommend that she take her notes right on the PowerPoint. We talk about tape recording the lecture. I talk about how to review her notes when she gets home.

Father keeps jumping in, commenting, grumbling…almost as if he is waiting for me to buckle and say “You’re right. We’re unreasonable. What were we thinking. No problem, I’ll just take notes for your daughter and give her the quiz questions before class so she can study them ahead of time!” But I hold firm. I throw that fucking ball back in their fucking court, and I do it with a smile!

By the time Father and Student leave he has claimed defeat. The white flag flies over his head. He admits that this class sounds very interesting. That it seems like I really know what I’m doing. I have gained his respect (and a farewell hand shake)

*Father and Student exit scene right. Jessica deflates and runs in search of a much needed hugJ

1 comment:

  1. Good for you! I shared this with a coworker, because we work in administration and also have many instances of parents trying to fight battles for their children. Their otherwise adult children. These parents mean well (obviously they want to help their children), but they are often coming in already angry and with little information. I think the best thing parents can do is use these college years to help their children become functioning adults. They can listen to their children and then offer suggestions on what to do. If they feel that the student has done everything and is not being treated fairly they can certainly CALL or EMAIL to schedule an appointment. Showing up out of the blue and angry is very much counterproductive.

    ReplyDelete